


pep talk

by pageandpetals



Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Band Fic, Fluff, M/M, Pre-debut, Trainee Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-21
Updated: 2013-09-21
Packaged: 2019-04-27 01:54:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14415123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pageandpetals/pseuds/pageandpetals
Summary: It’s Jongdae’s birthday, and everything is terrifying.





	pep talk

**Author's Note:**

> [twitter](http://twitter.com/pageandpetals) | [cc](http://curiouscat.me/pageandpetals)

“Thanks for buying us that cake, hyung,” Jongdae says after the kitchen’s cleared up, the gifts put aside for Jongdae to take back to the EXO-M dormitory, and the other EXO members split off in twos and threes either to go outside for a walk or hole up in their respective dorm rooms and rest. They’d only moved out of the trainee dorms a few weeks before Jongdae’s 19th birthday; hell, they’d only found out they’d be part of SM’s new boy band less than a month ago. It’s all a bit surreal, still; to go from being a normal college-bound kid to preparing for debut in half a year’s time, to spending your most important birthday not with family but with your new groupmates… it’s a lot to handle.

“Well, what kind of hyung would I be if I didn’t treat the birthday boy?” Junmyeon laughs, throwing his arm around Jongdae’s shoulder when he lazily coils his arms around Junmyeon’s neck from where he’s standing beside Junmyeon, resting his chin on Junmyeon’s shoulder. Junmyeon ruffles his hair. “Was it a good birthday? I mean, aside from the seven hours of rehearsal today.”

Jongdae laughs. “Even with that, yeah, it was a good one.” He rubs his face against the material of Junmyeon’s t-shirt, scrunching up his nose. “Wish my parents could have been here, but it’s sort of…”

“Cramped,” Junmyeon finishes for him, extricating himself from Jongdae’s grasp and steering him gently in the direction of the couch.

“Yeah,” Jongdae says, flopping down next to Junmyeon, who curls up in the corner next to the armrest. Jongdae’s quiet for a moment, letting himself lean into Junmyeon’s body, because he always indulges Jongdae’s need for physical closeness without teasing him or pulling away. “Hyung, do you still get lonely? Like, you’ve been doing this so long… do you get used to it?”

Junmyeon’s lower lip sticks out when he really thinks about something; it’s one of Jongdae’s favorite odd little habits of his. “You get used to it because it’s constant, you know? It’s just something you have to learn to deal with,” he says finally, tucking in the tag sticking out of the back of Jongdae’s t-shirt. It’s times like these that make their one-year age gap seem so much wider; Junmyeon’s too wise and considerate to only be twenty years old, Jongdae thinks. “But yeah, I definitely get lonely. _But_...” He smiles the way Jongdae really likes to see him smile, when he shows all his teeth and his eyes turn into perfect little crescents. “I think now that I’m not on my own, now that I have EXO, I won’t feel as lonely as I used to sometimes.”

Jongdae slips his hand into Junmyeon’s, lacing their fingers together with a comforting squeeze. They’re quiet again, Jongdae slouched against Junmyeon, stroking Junmyeon’s thumb with his own, until Jongdae says in a tiny voice, “Hyung, I know I said I wasn’t scared of going to China, but suddenly I am and I don’t know what to do.” He sighs into Junmyeon’s sleeve and sucks his lower lip into his mouth. “It’s not like I’m scared to _go_ , because traveling will be fun and I want to perform all over the world, but I’m scared to leave. At least here my parents are only an hour away, and I can see you and Baekhyun and Chanyeol and everyone else whenever I want… but going to China just seems so… so… _final_ , you know?” He peers up at Junmyeon with an anxious tilt to his eyebrows. “I don’t know if I’m ready to be Chen yet.”

“But I think the very fact that you volunteered to go means that you _are_ ready,” Junmyeon says, squeezing Jongdae’s hand tightly. “Or you will be, once you have some more time to get used to the idea. We still have a lot of work to do before we can go out and conquer the world, you know.” He grins down at Jongdae and presses his cheek to the top of Jongdae’s head. “But you’re going to be there doing the thing you love, remember? Think of that.”

Jongdae nods against Junmyeon’s shirt, having migrated halfway into his lap to snuggle against his chest. “I wish you could come with me,” he says, as boldly as he dares, heart beating a little too fast in his chest. “I really like everyone in EXO-M, but I want you to come with me more than anything.”

“Why me?” Junmyeon laughs. “There’s nothing that special about me.”

Jongdae sits up so fast he practically gives himself whiplash. “Don’t say that,” he scolds, punching Junmyeon in the arm as lovingly as he possibly can. “How could you even think that, hyung? You’re the leader of EXO-K, you’re really talented, you know pretty much everything anyone could ever know about being a trainee…”

“Only because I’ve been here so long I practically haunt the place,” Junmyeon says, earning himself another punch in the arm. “ _Ow._ ”

“Good, it better hurt,” Jongdae sniffs, stretching his arms around Junmyeon’s shoulders and burying his face in his neck. “You can’t say things like that.”

“Why not?” Junmyeon says, an amused lilt coloring his tone.

“Because,” Jongdae says imperiously, lifting his head and sliding his hands up to hold Junmyeon’s face, “you’re special to me, and I won’t let anyone talk badly about you, not even you.” He sucks in a breath, inches away from Junmyeon’s face, and before he can talk himself out of it, he ducks in to kiss Junmyeon briefly on the mouth.

Junmyeon freezes in shock, and Jongdae pulls back to stare wide-eyed at him for half a second before he’s pushing himself off of the couch and beating a fast retreat to the front door.

“ _Jongdae_ ,” Junmyeon intones behind him, and Jongdae pauses with his hand on the doorknob, breathing heavily through his nose until Junmyeon grabs his other wrist and forces him to turn around, practically slamming into Junmyeon.

“Hyung, I’m—” Jongdae stammers, putting his hands up against Junmyeon’s chest to keep them from knocking heads. He’s struck speechless for what feels like the first time in his life, but Junmyeon interrupts him.

“Was that what all of that was about, the talk about loneliness and missing me?” Junmyeon says, and Jongdae can’t quite get a good read on his expression. Damn all of his media training and his inscrutable poker face.

“I don’t—” Jongdae starts, and falters, staring down at his mismatched Rilakkuma socks. “Kind of. Yes.”

“Hmm.” He can feel Junmyeon studying him, can only imagine what he’s thinking right now, but then Junmyeon’s fingers are tilting his chin up and Jongdae can see that he’s smiling again. “Never thought I’d actually have a chance to tell you the feeling’s mutual.”

“ _What_.” Jongdae’s jaw would drop if Junmyeon wasn’t holding it in place.

“You,” Junmyeon says slowly, stepping forward and leaning in, “are a brave person, and I think someday you’re going to surprise yourself with how much you’re truly capable of.”

“You really think so?” Jongdae breathes, his lips mere centimeters from Junmyeon’s.

“I really do,” Junmyeon smiles, and closes the gap.

**Author's Note:**

> [Cross-posted from LiveJournal in April 2018; author's note left as is.]
> 
>  **author’s note** : Lauren made me do it. This is so cheesy and unbeta’d and I don’t know why I wrote it except it was after midnight and I was having inconvenient Jongdae feels since it was his birthday and everything. BUHUHUHHHHHH PERFECT BRAVE LITTLE PRINCE HAPPY BIRTHDAY ;~~~; <
> 
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/pageandpetals) | [cc](http://curiouscat.me/pageandpetals)


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